“You have a special place in the world. All you have to do is find it. Do not give up on yourself, on the truths you have realized. Do not give in to those who would crush your dreams like nutshells. And never turn away from forever love.”
— Ellen Hopkins. (quote found via Little Reminders of Love)
i found this and needed to share it with you because it was good to find today. i have been so down, its so hard to get up in the morning.
im so upset that i am this down, and its the holidays and everyone else is happy. it makes me feel like i cant really talk to anyone because i dont want to bring them down too with my problems. and i hate that i dont have much positive things to write about here as well because i dont want to depress any of my readers either!! so im sorry if it is :(
there are 2 huge things in my life that are depressing me. My job and the fact that its ending and something i saw about M.
I am sad to leave all my friends at work and have to start over again. I dont think there will be a choice and i will just have to leave. So the process of finding another one really sucks.
i found something out about M. i saw something that i probably shouldnt have and it is eating me up inside and i dont know if its true or not, but all evidence points to the fact that it is true..
i need your advice.
if you find something, that you are NOT supposed to be looking in and its bad, what do you do? do you confront them? do you forget you saw it? do you break up with them?
i dont know why this happens to me. why cant someone just like me?
please, advice. i need it bad.
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15 comments:
You confront them or it will eat you up and you give them a chance to defend them self then follow what you belive to be true.
Hun if your upset about something with M even if you accidentially found out talk to him about it. Be calm when you bring you up & take it from there. If it's hurting you & making you upset then you should know the truth. Really.
First, HUGS!!!
Second, you have to confront him about it.. or else it will always be there, and it will eat you alive. Love shouldn't make you feel this way.
Oh, NB. You can't catch a break lately, can you?
Not EVERYONE is happy around the holidays. Just everyone on TELEVISION.
Truth, babe. Truth. The truth hurts, the truth sucks, but there just isn't any benefit to lying. Tell M what you learned, and talk about it. You're not going to stop thinking about it, so you may as well just drag it out onto the carpet and talk it out.
The first thing you said in this post tells you that you already know the answer. Whatever happens with all of this is because you DO have a place and what's going on around you is guiding you in the direction of where you belong. That is what you have to trust.. the benevolence of your guide, the one you came with, your true self.
I guess it depends what the news you found out was. I think you have to talk to him about it, even if he will be upset you snooped. It might be time to cut the cord. Just think...would you be happy staying in a broken relationship and working on it or breaking up and able to find something new? Your heart will know the answer. I hope everything works out! <3
Lauren
www.laurensthoughts.com
hugs
I hate confrontation but it's the ONLY way to go in this situation. You can't not talk to him about it. If only for your sanity. I'm sorry to hear things are going so crappy though. Let us know how things go <3
You have been given so very sound advice. I have just been through the same thing. I found something I shouldn't have and I confronted him. He denied it but I don't really believe him. I think sometimes lies or deception means the end. Or is a means to the end.
And believe me it hurts like hell to say that. I have stayed with him to "work things out" but honestly I don't think it's working. I hope for you that your heart leads you down the right path. xxx
I agree with everyone else, although I know how HARD it is to go through with the confrontation. But think about it like this. Yes, maybe you were snooping but is your snooping worse than what he did? For example, say I had naked photos of a guy I was having an affair with and my husband was purposely snooping and found them. Should he not say anything because he wasn't suppose to be snooping? NOOOO!!! I should not have been having an affair and should not have had those naked photos - his snooping was wrong too, but it's a moot point because it wasn't as bad as my naked photos. So, if you found something that makes you uncomfortable, then the snooping doesn't matter, at least in my opinion.
Seriously, NB - you are worth soooooo much more than all this misery. Your life, your feelings, your happiness is worth the world and if things in your life aren't supporting your happiness, you need to look elsewhere. We only have one life to live, so why waste it on unhappiness. I truly think you can find your spot in the world, you just have to look for it.
P.S. I'm not actually having an affair and I don't have naked photos on my phone. Just FYI....
P.S.S. Sorry for the very long comment.
Aw, it hurts my heart to read this! I know how excruciating the job process is so I really feel for you and wish you the best of luck.
As for M. This is a really tough situation. Honestly, you have no right to snoop through anything of his so if what you found was discovered by snooping, you don't have the right to confront him about it. But since it's something that eats you up, you can't just ignore it. I guess I would try to figure out a way to bring it up or bring up whether or not he's being completely honest with you and if you can trust him. Somehow, you need to find a way to pose that question without making it seem like you know something because he could easily realize that you did something you weren't supposed to do and then it could turn on you. I don't know what he did, I don't know the situation. But I wouldn't jump to conclusions unless you know the truth of it, and hopefully it can come from him. If it's something awful, figure it out as soon as you can to make the best decision. Hang in there and feel free to lean on all of us at any time.
Talk to them and have them explain things. Sounds like they really need to communicate with you! Check out my blog sometime!
Awww sweetie, it's hard to say.. I guess for me it depends on what that something is? But if it's a deal-breaker for you, you definitely need to talk about it. Good luck! xox
You wrote this a week ago so for your sake I HOPE you resolved this. I've been there too, and there's no way ever I could let it go. If you don't confront M you will start to lose trust and all will go downhill from there. Just say you happened to come across whatever it was by accident, don't admit to snooping. =) Good luck.
you wouldnt be snooping "accidentally"" so you are either guilty of something or he snoops accidentally on you and you are doing it as payback...not worth being in a relationship if either of you's fully trust eachother.
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