I finally got to see my best friend this weekend... and she is 14 weeks preggo!!! Meaning I will be an aunt soon! It was so nice to see her. It's been like almost two months because she has been sick and then busy and then schedules didnt work. So it was good to just chill out, talk and watch tv.
i wish she lived closer. i mean granted she is only 30-40 minutes away but when i get out of work so late and have the limited time to hang out and she is sick and tired, it sucks :(
we are planning her wedding for either next summer of February 2012. i think baby and wedding in one year might be too much.
the crazy thing is, this is V, my ex best friend, that i wasnt talking to because of my Ex T, and i reunited with her in March. She was supposed to get married this year and i wouldnt have been in the wedding because we weren't friends. But (unfortunately) it got called off and we started talking again and she met this new guy, whom she is going to marry and is having the baby with.
i am just glad that after all that heart ache and shit she went through that i wasnt there for, i can be there for her now during these times and all these crazy life changes. its a good feeling to know that i can be there and i can continue making up all this time that i owe her and when she needs people now.
We had a GREAT time!!!! It was almost like we never stopped talking. I can't believe we ever did. I am so glad that we reconnected.... I can't believe I waited that long. We had a great time.
I am so excited :) :)
I saw her mom & dad.. it was just insanity. I was so happy... hard to explain. We talked about so much stuff. SO much stuff... not even enough time to talk about everything. It was intense. So after talking for hours we decided to go out and had an even better time!
I thank everyone for their advice and i'm so glad I went through with it!!!!
It is final.... I am meeting V (ex best friend) for dinner and drinks on Thursday to talk. I am nervous/excited/freaking out. It has been almost 3 years. We didn't even really know what to say on the phone today but I suggested that we go and hang out because it might be less awkward.
I am actually really excited I think. I miss her!!! I haven't seen or heard from her in so so long. And since T is basically not in my life anymore at all.. and most likely will never be again, I have nothing to lose.
I know its not going to be the same ever again and our bond that we once had will never be there again, but if she's willing to forgive me, it has potential. I am not expecting a lot but I am happy for whatever happens.
Ahhhhhhh i miss my friend :( :(
I am really excited.
I also met my cousin that my family has never met before.. apparently my uncle was married before my aunt and had 4 sons that we never knew about or met. And it was cool to meet another cousin.
There are a lot of things that have been bothering me that I can't really write about on here, which makes me even more bothered. So I am going to write in brief about it but you'll get the picture..here is one thing.
I sent out an email to V (the ex best friend) on Saturday night. I don't know what really made me do it but I have been deciding for a while and I kept it short, basically just apologizing for going down the path that I did and leaving her behind and picking T over her. She hasn't written back yet. I dont know why I chose that night to write her back.. I have a slight idea what why, but thats neither here nor there.
I dont know know how i feel about her writing back... i dont know what to expect. I know that it would be crazy and so different.. and probably natural at the same time. She was literally like my sister. And the three of us... we were like sisters as well...
I honestly miss it a lot.. but at the same time, my real fear was what if T wanted me back and then I became friends with V again? Then what?
That's why I waited so long, its been almost 7 months since T and I have been together and spoken to each other....and as much as it makes me horribly sad to say, he probably will never talk to me again and I have finally begun to accept it and let it sink in.
Lately I have been considering reconnecting with my ex best friend, V. I don't know if that is a good or bad idea. I miss her and I feel like there really was no reason for her to actually be out of my life in the first place, but I really don't know if after almost 3 years if she would take me back into her life... or if she even has any place in mine..
Let me give you some background information on the situation with me and V. We met in college and became instantly friends. Me, V and Cherry were best friends --the 3 B's if you will.
We lived in the dorm together and then V and I moved into two different apartments together. We basically spent every waking minute together for over 3 years. I even went to her home country, Venezuela, with her and met her entire family.
I have so many memories that have included her in my life and for me not to be able to even contact her anymore really sucks.
So when we were living together in 2003, I started to date T (yes, the T) for a couple months in the summer. Since I was so not ready for the relationship he wanted, I broke up with him, but him and V had already sort of established something..... and at that point I didn't care because I was onto someone new anyway. So a year later they started to date when we had moved into our new apartment. He literally moved in with us and they dated for a couple of months and then she went back to her ex, cheated on T, and left him completely heart broken.
Now there I was to pick up the pieces and help him find somewhere else to live, being the nice friend that I was.
V and I moved out from this apartment and by this time, things had already fallen apart with her and Cherry, so they were no longer friends anymore. In 2006 I started dating T again because V had basically fallen off the face of the earth from the guy she was dating and T just happened to be around so we started hanging out. Things got more serious, and let me tell you, T HATED V. With a passion. They weren't allowed to be in the same place at the same time. So this caused a serious, serious problem for me.
I was caught in a really bad position. V and I had stopped speaking due to an incident where I couldn't invite her to my birthday and it ended up being really fucked up on my end. And i regret it.
In 2007, I missed her sooo much that I sent her a message and we met up and talked and started talking all of the time. T finally decided that he couldn't handle it anymore and didn't want me to be friends with her anymore. He told me to choose between him and her. Then I was REALLY caught in a bad situation. At this point I was LIVING with T in an apartment and I didn't know what to do.
In the end, I chose T.
I don't regret my choice. I did love T. Very very much so. But I never would let him live down that he made me chose between him and my best friend. I thought that was completely unfair and horrible and so uncalled for.
But that was a choice I had to make regardless of how fucked up it was.
And here I am.
I am not with T anymore and I am wondering if it is fucked up of me to even try to contact her? Would it even be worth it? Is it just horrible of me to want to?
I am not sure..... I am reaching out to ask my readers what they think because the people I would ask know us, so I want to see what other outside perspectives have to say.
