Friday, November 5, 2010

are you more ready then your significant other?

Have you ever felt that you are more ready for the serious part of your relationship then the person you are in it with is?

I feel like that. And i have also felt like that in my past relationship too.

Don't get me wrong, I really liked being single, but that was only because I found a few people that I wanted to hangout with and I spent my time with them. I really didn't do toooo much of the random guys hooking up business. That was more during college.

I just feel like I am ready to get married, live in a house, get a dog, be a teacher, and chill. It's probably the holidays that are doing this to me and the fact that I really like M and i could see this actually going somewhere, but that's how i feel.  And i cant talk to him about it because i think he is still not used to the whole relationship being good and there not being crazy drama since I am not a complete nutso like his ex.

With T in my last relationship, even though we lived together, it felt like we weren't together. He also said he didnt want to get married, and I do. So i felt like i had no future with him, i really didnt even think about it. But i wanted to settle down..

With M,,,,, i can see things. But he is definitely not there yet...probably not for a couple years. And I am not trying to rush either because I am broke and couldnt afford any of that stuff anyway, but i think about it.

Do you think its just because I am a girl and I think of these things? Does anyone else think of this as well? Can you not tell your significant other because they will get scared?



Melanie's Randomness said...

I've been exactly where you are. I was ready about 2 years ago when i was dating my ex. He wasn't done he used to tell me & was too stupid to realize he wasn't done looking for new girls either. I was just a stop on the road basically. I wanted to tell him I wanted it all with him but I didnt. But that was after dating him for 2 years. If you haven't been dating M at least 6 months I wouldn't rush things at all with the marriage talk. My current bf is more ready then I am to get married but we've been only dating 5 months. It scared me a lil when he was talking about marriage cuz yes we've only been together a short while. I'd say play it by ear dear. Take it one day at a time! =)

Novelista Barista said...

lol oh yah i will not mention anything liekt aht for like at least a year lol --this is why i share it here!

Blondie said...

I think there is nothing wrong with sharing your goals with someone. I'm 34 and not up for just casual relationships anymore, so I lay it on the line. If I scare a guy off, he's probably not the guy for me then! Take some time to think about what YOU want this weekend honey! You deserve to get what you want! Kori xoxo

Sara.A said...

Hey, I've been following your blog for a while now but have never commented before.

It's really good to see someone having this dilemma as well! I'm in a much newer relationship with a guy, but I can already tell I'm ready to move farther commitment-wise than he is. I don't know the specifics about your case, but I think in mine it's just that I'm more in tune with my emotions than the guy is. I already know how I feel, he just needs to work his feelings out more before he gets to the same place. However, he is showing positive signs everyday that he'll get to where I am. I hope things work out well for you in this matter!

Luna said...

many times it is simply being a girl that makes us think this way. it has a lot to do with society. my boyfriend and i love each other very much and do want to get married. he was ready before i was. not to say i didnt want to marry him but i would like to have certain things ready before we do that. he would be happy simply going to a courthouse and thats it. i would like a small wedding. i want us to live together and be more stable and have some money saved for the wedding, and honeymoon but not be broke either.


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